Listening Part 2. Here are a few signs that may indicate you need to work on your listening skills:
1. Your partner (kids, family, colleagues, friends etc) say things like ‘you never listen’, ‘why won’t you just listen’, ‘I’ve told you a million times’ etc. This one is a BIG CLUE!
2. You’ve never had the experience of going out with friends / partner and feeling like the other person has done all the talking. Either all of your mates / partner are really cool and engaging, or possibly you’ve been dominating the conversation …. it might be worth thinking about. Perhaps have an honest review with yourself of what proportion of the event was you talking compared to the others? It’s not enough to chuck in the odd question if you jump in again soon after.
3. Similar to above, you get home and say things to yourself like ‘they weren’t very chatty’. Maybe there wasn’t room for them to be chatty or they didn’t feel heard and so gave up?
4. You often know that you’ve said the wrong thing after the event. Perhaps you were so keen to give your opinion / experience that you didn’t really hear what was going on for the other person & hence didn’t match their mood / feeling. Empathy works wonders and is far more effective than advice.
5. You felt they were wrong or were feeling judgemental about them – another sign of not really listening to their experience.
Feel free to share / like. Added bonus – perhaps those in your life who could work on their listening skills will spot the post also!!